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14 October 2010 @ 07:09 pm
GtKY Meme Days 6 and 7  
My best friends are my sisters!  lavrapesto and h_s_doodles.  (And if you have ever or do ever get a reply from one of the two of them, that's because someone forgot to log out.  Hmmph.)  My sister Laura and I are three and a half years apart, but I suspect that one day scientists will discover that we are the only case of two siblings from two different pregnancies who just ended up with identical DNA.  Because we're the same person.  But all three of us watch the same stuff, read the same stuff, laugh at the same stuff, have the same temperaments, and so on. 

I've been trying to figure out what "a moment" means.  I ask the little man behind the help desk in my brain, but he hasn't been giving me an answer.  So rather than try to pick out something profound or meaningful or whatever, I am instead just picking something completely at random.  So when I was an undergrad, I was in an apartment with one bedroom but two other roommates; it was a strange set-up.  One of my roommates had been my friend since freshman year, and we got along great.  The third roommate was randomly assigned to us. 

Now, she was a nice person in general.  But she was kind of...strange.  Part of her strangeness was the strange dichotomy she had going on, being the daughter of a very wealthy Silicon Valley guy, but then being incredibly frugal - to the point of being a miser.  Like, I think I've never experienced more joy than the time she came out of the bathroom after applying $1 (ONE DOLLAR) Mexican hair dye.  It was ~amazing.  Part of it was that she was a born-again, but like, just born-again.  So she was REALLY INTO JESUS and didn't really like that she was living with two heathens.  I only mention the fact that she was super-religious because it is relevant to this story.

She invites two of her friends to come stay for a long weekend.  It was kind of awkward, but I'd had a friend over, so I couldn't really say no, even though one friend =/= two friends when you're talking a one-bedroom apartment.  Her friends are pretty much just the same as her.  One night that weekend there's a party in the complex.  All the apartments open out on a courtyard, so the party's just right outside our door.  Some guy knocks on our door.  She answers, even though it's almost midnight and everyone's in their jammies and getting ready for bed.  This random guy claims to have once lived in our apartment, and could he come in?  Before I can say, "Dude, no, what is wrong with you," she lets him in!  And he kind of looks around, and I'm watchful from the other side of the living room.  And then he's like, thanks!  Bye!

And my roommate stops him.  "Are you going back out to the party?  To do what?  To drink?"

"Uh...yeah," he says, because duh.  He's at a party.

Now, my roommate was a teetotaler.  Even though we were all 21, she was adamant we not have any alcohol in the apartment.  I told her that it was her choice not to drink, not mine, and things were kind of tense.  But damn it, if I wanted a glass of wine with dinner or a screwdriver as I watched TV, that was my right.  She really didn't like drinking, though.  Really.  Really.

One of her friends LITERALLY BLOCKS THE DOOR.  This guy starts realizing that he is in an apartment with three really weird girls (and one girl who was watching from afar, so flabbergasted that it didn't even occur to her to just ask everyone to stop and go away).  He very nicely asks again to leave.

The other friend goes to the kitchen and GETS A KNIFE.  I am totally not kidding.  She gets a FRAKKING BUTCHER KNIFE and walks out and holds it all coy.  "Why don't you just stay here?"  

They end up sitting around him in a creepy cult-like knife-wielding Jesus sandwich on the couch, explaining to him why he should not go to college parties and why he should not drink, and why he should start going to church.  I continue to watch, because my brain has leaked out my ears.  I don't think anyone's going to get killed, but I'm not going to climb into bed while there is a strange man held at knife point ten feet away.  After half an hour (HALF AN HOUR), they finally let him leave.  I may or may not have said in a loud voice that I really needed some sleep, even though I rarely actually went to sleep before 2am then.  And then they just laughed, like it had been the funniest thing in the world.

I'm totally serious.  That actually happened.  I don't even know, you guys.
 
 
 
(Deleted comment)
Shannonkungfuwaynewho on October 15th, 2010 03:14 am (UTC)
My memory of that night is slightly skewed because I've told this story so many times - I think I'm remembering the story more than the actual event, at this point - but I do know that when he did end up leaving, he just looked...numb. Like he'd been hit over the head or something.

Poor guy, heh.
enigmaticblues: wes sideglanceenigmaticblues on October 15th, 2010 01:17 am (UTC)
LMHO! Oh, dear. I laugh because I know these people. Or, well, I don't KNOW them, but I've known people very much like them, and if I don't laugh, I would have to cry. Plus, the "creepy cult-like knife-wielding Jesus sandwich" is just funny.

Thank the sweet baby Jesus that there is wine. I mean, Jesus drank wine, so it has to be okay, right? *g*
Shannon: btvs willowkungfuwaynewho on October 15th, 2010 03:15 am (UTC)
Oh, she was incredible. The second day after she moved in, I was watching Buffy, and she asked me to watch it someplace else because she "didn't want demons in the apartment." I was like, um...no.

I have so many Roommate stories, it's not even funny. Although the stories themselves are funny!
ghanima sun: spikeghanimasun on October 16th, 2010 02:06 am (UTC)
lol, it's a good thing you weren't into Harry Potter at the time too!

Edited at 2010-10-16 02:06 am (UTC)
Shannon: btvs willowkungfuwaynewho on October 16th, 2010 02:17 am (UTC)
Lord, I don't even want to know. One day I got frustrated and ended up arguing with her about the fact that yes, the dinosaurs were real. They were not implanted in the ground by God to test people's faith. THERE USED TO BE DINOSAURS.

Oh, it's to laugh, now. There were times, though...
ghanima sun: scienceghanimasun on October 16th, 2010 03:39 am (UTC)
!!! I don't even know how I could have handled interacting with someone like that. Yikes.
Holly: Starbuck bwhollywobbles on October 15th, 2010 01:47 am (UTC)
Aw, I think it's neat that you're best friends with your sisters! That doesn't seem to happen very often.

Ohmygosh, that story. That... story. I don't know what to say. I can't even laugh at it.
Shannon: bsg revelations karakungfuwaynewho on October 15th, 2010 03:17 am (UTC)
You have to laugh at it! I mean, seriously. What can you do besides laugh?

If you need any more reason why I'm BFF with my sisters, just look at Sarah's reply just below yours. Yeah. I laughed for like two solid minutes when I checked my email after Fringe.
Holly: Near palpable sexual tensionhollywobbles on October 15th, 2010 03:55 am (UTC)
Ohmygoodness, yes. I just sat there and laughed and laughed. Your Little Mermaid one rocks my socks off, too.
Mr. Susanh_s_doodles on October 15th, 2010 02:22 am (UTC)
Shannon: bicycle dadkungfuwaynewho on October 15th, 2010 03:20 am (UTC)
Mr. Susan: jonsi painth_s_doodles on October 15th, 2010 03:28 am (UTC)
Shannon: xf yappikungfuwaynewho on October 15th, 2010 12:23 pm (UTC)
nhpwnhpw on October 15th, 2010 12:23 pm (UTC)
I was doing OK, reading with total interest in where this was going until "knife-wielding Jesus sandwich." Then I lost it. That year must have been all kinds of awesome for you.

Shannonkungfuwaynewho on October 15th, 2010 12:25 pm (UTC)
Even when she finally decided to move out, we still had to deal with months of her shenanigans. (When you move out, you're supposed to turn in your keys! You can't just randomly let yourself back in to see if "we have your mail" or to "look for something" or to "watch TV.")
nhpwnhpw on October 15th, 2010 01:09 pm (UTC)
OMG. She sounds a few fries short of a Happy Meal.
Shannonkungfuwaynewho on October 15th, 2010 03:29 pm (UTC)
Well, my first randomly assigned roommate had an honest-to-God nervous breakdown after three weeks, so everyone after that was a piece of cake.

(I will never forget when that one needed to make a phone call at 4am, and hadn't unpacked her own phone yet, so she just turned on the overhead light in the bedroom and stood next to my bed and patiently waited for me to wake up so she could ask if she could use my phone.)
nhpwnhpw on October 15th, 2010 04:22 pm (UTC)
Creeeeepy...

We had something similar happen when we were sharing a house with some people in order to keep rent down while my husband was in grad school (Um. For reals, if you ever get married, do not let anybody else live with you. At least not at first. It's really, really hard on the marriage. Yeah.) He tells the story that - one morning he woke up and he felt like someone was in the bedroom, and he got all freaked - turns out it was his sister, who was going through our bedroom to get to our bathroom to borrow our scale, because she didn't have one.

Um. We bought her one. Yeah.
ghanima sun: wtfghanimasun on October 16th, 2010 02:04 am (UTC)
Holy. Shit. That story is the creepiest thing ever.
I would be afraid to still live with that woman after that! It sounds like they basically held him hostage for a half hour. Wow. I don't know if I would have been able to move either if I had witnessed that because it is just so outrageous and they sound sort of unbalanced to me. Yikes.

I'm so glad my college roommate experience was never that dramatic or scary. Granted it means I have no stories to tell really, but at least I didn't have to be afraid of my roommates practically kidnapping people!
Shannon: tng dynamic duokungfuwaynewho on October 16th, 2010 02:15 am (UTC)
Honestly? She was too dumb to be afraid of, LOL. She ended up flunking an entire class because she didn't cite a single source in her final paper. Her defense was that the syllabus never said you had to have a bibliography - how does someone get to college and not know that you have to cite sources? And then the next semester, she was taking it again, and she'd always be skipping class; I'd hear her on the phone going, "Oh, I took this class last semester, I don't have to go, haha!" Dumb. She was so dumb. She was really, really dumb.
ghanima sun: stupidghanimasun on October 16th, 2010 03:48 am (UTC)
Hah, people like that are scary but in a completely different way!