I've been trying to figure out what "a moment" means. I ask the little man behind the help desk in my brain, but he hasn't been giving me an answer. So rather than try to pick out something profound or meaningful or whatever, I am instead just picking something completely at random. So when I was an undergrad, I was in an apartment with one bedroom but two other roommates; it was a strange set-up. One of my roommates had been my friend since freshman year, and we got along great. The third roommate was randomly assigned to us.
Now, she was a nice person in general. But she was kind of...strange. Part of her strangeness was the strange dichotomy she had going on, being the daughter of a very wealthy Silicon Valley guy, but then being incredibly frugal - to the point of being a miser. Like, I think I've never experienced more joy than the time she came out of the bathroom after applying $1 (ONE DOLLAR) Mexican hair dye. It was ~amazing. Part of it was that she was a born-again, but like, just born-again. So she was REALLY INTO JESUS and didn't really like that she was living with two heathens. I only mention the fact that she was super-religious because it is relevant to this story.
She invites two of her friends to come stay for a long weekend. It was kind of awkward, but I'd had a friend over, so I couldn't really say no, even though one friend =/= two friends when you're talking a one-bedroom apartment. Her friends are pretty much just the same as her. One night that weekend there's a party in the complex. All the apartments open out on a courtyard, so the party's just right outside our door. Some guy knocks on our door. She answers, even though it's almost midnight and everyone's in their jammies and getting ready for bed. This random guy claims to have once lived in our apartment, and could he come in? Before I can say, "Dude, no, what is wrong with you," she lets him in! And he kind of looks around, and I'm watchful from the other side of the living room. And then he's like, thanks! Bye!
And my roommate stops him. "Are you going back out to the party? To do what? To drink?"
"Uh...yeah," he says, because duh. He's at a party.
Now, my roommate was a teetotaler. Even though we were all 21, she was adamant we not have any alcohol in the apartment. I told her that it was her choice not to drink, not mine, and things were kind of tense. But damn it, if I wanted a glass of wine with dinner or a screwdriver as I watched TV, that was my right. She really didn't like drinking, though. Really. Really.
One of her friends LITERALLY BLOCKS THE DOOR. This guy starts realizing that he is in an apartment with three really weird girls (and one girl who was watching from afar, so flabbergasted that it didn't even occur to her to just ask everyone to stop and go away). He very nicely asks again to leave.
The other friend goes to the kitchen and GETS A KNIFE. I am totally not kidding. She gets a FRAKKING BUTCHER KNIFE and walks out and holds it all coy. "Why don't you just stay here?"
They end up sitting around him in a creepy cult-like knife-wielding Jesus sandwich on the couch, explaining to him why he should not go to college parties and why he should not drink, and why he should start going to church. I continue to watch, because my brain has leaked out my ears. I don't think anyone's going to get killed, but I'm not going to climb into bed while there is a strange man held at knife point ten feet away. After half an hour (HALF AN HOUR), they finally let him leave. I may or may not have said in a loud voice that I really needed some sleep, even though I rarely actually went to sleep before 2am then. And then they just laughed, like it had been the funniest thing in the world.
I'm totally serious. That actually happened. I don't even know, you guys.